33 Microsummaries of Recent Lit Journal Stories
to Prove I’m Not a Submittable Carpetbomber

by Joe Sacksteder

 

  1. Dour boy finds mermaid
  2. American Pie for hifalutin man
  3. Depression as black ferret
  4. Cowardly foursome
  5. Permanent dark, dad gone
  6. Girl swallows moon
  7. 9/11 dick
  8. Biodegradable coffins and black market antlers
  9. Narrator as scheming bureaucracy
  10. There’s nothing less blue-collar than blue-collar fiction
  11. Crush on Isaac Newton
  12. Lost in woods remembering dead husband
  13. North Country but in the South
  14. Hundred Dollar Baby
  15. Fuck San Diego
  16. Girl swallows moon
  17. No sex
  18. Depressed man cultivates storms
  19. Pets getting hit by cars
  20. Pig iron trauma
  21. Head dial that helps guy tune his emotions
  22. List of women loved
  23. Sister pops bubble boy brother’s bubble
  24. Letter to dad’s soap opera actress mistress
  25. Sex with ex while fantasizing about stewardess
  26. Watching pregnant women explode
  27. Baseball
  28. Insane woman pretends to give birth to rabbits
  29. Engages with theory, Derrida
  30. Frontier people happy town burned down
  31. “We were spared”
  32. Girl swallows moon
  33. Can’t pay dealer
Joe Sacksteder’s debut collection is forthcoming from Sarabande Books in 2019, and his album of Werner Herzog audio collages, Fugitive Traces, is available from Punctum Books. He’s a PhD candidate at the University of Utah, where he’s managing editor Quarterly West. Recent publications include Denver Quarterly, Florida Review, Hobart, and Booth X.